In Disguise
by SuperPaige
Summary: Vegeta and Bulma have switched bodies! Now they will have to work out each other's lives, until everything returns to normal. Will they do it, or crack under the pressure?
1. Arguments

**Summary****- "You have no idea what it's like to be me!" Was all that Bulma needed to say. Because when she woke the next morning, she found she was in the body of a Saiyan Prince! And Vegeta was in the body of a petite Earthling! How, and who, did this? And will they ever get back to normal?**

**WARNINGS- Coarse language, sexual preferences, yadda, yadda, yadda. Oh, and as is the usual custom of my stories, it's about a year after Buu saga, and Bulla and Trunks are closer aged. GT never happened. No Pan, because I hate her.**

**Disclaimer- If I owned it, we would be able to see Super Saiyan 4 naked. *snicker***

**Arguments**

It was the average Friday morning in the Brief Household, and everything was in a jumble as usual.

"Mom! I can't find my shoe!"

"Daddy, Trunks took the last of the milk!"

"Vegeta, would you stop swearing so much!"

"Well, I can't find my goddamn car keys!"

"Then just fly there! Damn it, did any of you see my jacket?"

"Mommy! Tell Trunks to stop poking me in the face!"

"She started it, and I still can't find my shoe!"

Bulma ran around the kitchen, packing the children's lunches and looking for Trunks' lost shoe.

Her counterpart tore apart the living room, searching for the keys to his Corvette and Bulma's leather jacket. Something shiny caught his eye, his heart skipped a beat, but he realized it was just a nickel. "Fucking money."

"Vegeta! Stop swearing!" Bulma scolded, her butt to him as she searched in the cabinet under the sink. "Trunks, how did you manage to lose your shoe?"

"I think Goten hid it when he was here yesterday." Trunks flicked a spoon full of milk at his younger sister, and laughed sinisterly.

"Ew, MOM! Tell him to stop!" Bulla wiped it off, close to bursting into tears. "DADDY!" She yelled.

"Yes!" Vegeta said, pulling his keys from between the couch cushions. "I found the keys."

"Good, now find Trunks' shoe while I finish with these lunches!" Bulma shouted into the other room, spreading peanut butter on wheat bread.

"I don't _like _wheat, Mommy!" Bulla complained.

"Too bad."

The prince groaned in agony and went on to find the jacket and the shoe. _Just another day in paradise, _he thought sarcastically.

* * *

When the kids were finally out the door, lunches packed and shoe found, Vegeta had to take a five minute breather. He collapsed on the couch, and watched Bulma bustle about, getting herself ready.

"Woman, you should take a break before you explode." He absently jingled his car keys in his pocket.

"I don't have the time to take a break! There's this meeting and I have to give a stupid presentation about our new product and I think I'm going to explode!" She yelled at the roof, and bit back the threatening tears of stress.

"Calm down, it's just a meeting." He stood up.

"Ex_cuse _me?! It's not just a 'meeting'! But it's not like _you _would understand, Mr. Loafer."

"Since when did I become a shoe?"

"You know what I mean!"

"And I don't just 'loaf' around. Who else picks up your damn cargo for you?"

"I can easily get other people to do that!"

"Yes, but you don't pay me."

"Puh-leeze! I pay you every night, you horn dog. You know, when I'm _trying _to sleep!"

Vegeta rolled his eyes. "You are insufferable! You act like you have it so bad here! Hell, I wish I could've had this life when I was a blasted kid!"

"Oh, shut up with you're 'woe-is-me' life story! I wasn't some coddled child like you think I was! I went through a lot, too!"

"Not nearly as bad as what I went through!"

"Just shut the hell up!" She screamed. "Gods, I get sooo sick of you sometimes! You-You have no idea what it's like to be me!" She stormed to the front door, and slammed it behind her, not caring that she was barefoot and her skirt was hitched up past her thighs.

_If I didn't love her so damned much, she'd be dead right now! _Vegeta snarled inside his head before leaving out the back door, slamming it shut as well.

* * *

Come dinner time, the family had returned back home, a little less flustered, but a whole lot of tense. Of course, it was mostly between husband and wife. Not a lot was said, but there was plenty of eye contact and body language.

"Pass the ketchup, please?" Bulla said to her father. He just grumbled and slid to her, eyes set on his glaring wife (giving his own kind of glare, as well).

She gave a questionable glance to her older brother, who just shrugged in return as he chomped on his hotdog.

"So. How was school, kids?" Bulma asked, stabbing her lettuce angrily, still looking at her husband.

"I got in trouble for fightin' again," Trunks spoke up. "You guys gotta take me in school early tomorrow so I can go to detention."

Vegeta sipped from his glass of wine. "Was it with that one boy you always seem to get in trouble with?"

"No, not John. It was a girl this time. She tried to kiss me. So I hit her, and when she started cryin' the teacher caught me."

"Trunks! You don't _ever _hit a female! That isn't proper!"

"Why not?" Vegeta asked. "If she was causing him trouble, then I think he had a right to do it." He set down his glass and looked squarely at the aqua-haired heiress.

"Because it's the right thing to do. Everyone knows that."

"How is it the right thing to do? Perhaps, it's because women are for less superior compared to men?" The prince smirked.

Bulma sharply stood up, and threw down her fork onto the lettuce bowl, shattering the glass. "Goodnight!" She stomped off, smoke nearly floating off her head in puffs of angry steam. _He said that just to piss me off! Ugh, what a jerk!_

Vegeta sighed and put his head into his hands, his headache beginning to throb with vengeance. _I am going to regret what I just said…I might as well get the blankets on the couch now._

**~A/N~ Can't you see Vegeta driving a Corvette? Red, sleek, and shiny. He seems like he could be one of those 'obsessed with my car' men. My ex-boyfriend is one of them…**


	2. Surprise

**Surprise**

The next morning, Bulma woke with a start. She sat up in bed, and peered around the living room in wonder. _What the heck? How did I get down here on the sofa? _With a yawn, she pulled herself up and shuffled to the bathroom. As she started to pull down her pants, she realized how big her fingers had suddenly gotten, which made her look up the muscular arms. "What the hell is going on?" She whispered, and had a feeling in the pit of her stomach that she already knew. Gulping, she undid her pants and look down. And she screamed.

Quickly, she ran out of the restroom and up the steps, trying her best to coordinate the bulkier body and not to stumble over the big feet. _Please don't let the kids be up! _

"Hey, Dad!" Trunks called out to her, and she slumped over. _Damn! _"When are you taking me and Bulla to the park?"

"Er-um. Later? At erm- three?" Bulma said, grateful that her voice sounded like a man's and not hers.

"Okay…" Trunks gave her a suspicious look. "Are you alright, Dad? You seem…funny. Your chi feels different."

"Erm. I am-uh-doing a new training technique?" _That's something he does, right? Training and stuff? _"Um, yeah. It's making me much stronger." She put her hands on her hips and laughed triumphantly.

The lilac-haired eight year old just nodded slowly, and stepped back before running off into his bedroom as if someone had caught his underwear on fire.

_Okay, so I don't have his personality down just yet…_With a shake of her head, she dashed to the bedroom at the end of the hall. "Ve-I mean, Bulma! Answer the door!" She yelled, pounding on the door.

Suddenly, it opened, and she gave a shout of protest before being yanked inside. The door was slammed behind her before another word was spoken.

It took a lot of energy to stop Bulma from giggling at the sight. There he-well, she- was standing, looking like his angry self, only…it was so girly! The arms-crossed-eyebrows-knitted-in-the-middle-angry-scowl look was simply adorable on the female's face. "Aw, you're a cutie!" She laughed, but cringed when it came out in a deep raspy voice.

"Shut up," Vegeta growled, flicking back a strand of blue hair. "What the hell did you do, woman? You did this to me, didn't you?"

"What?! No! Why the hell would I _want _to be in your lumpy body? I don't want to be a stinky man like you! I would at least switch with someone nicer, like Goku…" The name sounded simply strange coming out in the prince's voice, as if speaking a different language.

Vegeta grunted, which sounded almost like a moan coming from the feminine voice, and he blushed when it blurted out. "Well, how the hell are we getting out of this mess? I don't want to be stuck in a _woman's _body. Least of all, you. I would at least go for Kakarott's woman. Tough and level-headed."

"Hmph! Fine, then go marry her!" Bulma said, turning her back on him, trying to hide her tears burning at her eyes.

The prince sighed, hugged Bulma from behind-_I'm hugging myself…I need to work out more, my waist is too thin._- "I didn't mean it like that, woman. Stop sulking. We need to think about this rationally, so lets sit down and try not to argue while we work this out."

She sniffled and turned around, smiling-_ugh, you can't tell this guy doesn't smile enough. His mouth is stiffer than hell._- and joined him at the bed.

"First things first, I don't want any of those idiots knowing about this. If I hear any jokes about it, I will kill them."

"Okay, so that's off limits." Bulma rolled her eyes. _Such a drama queen sometimes, I swear! _"If we're gonna do that, then I suppose we'll have to learn how to be like each other."

Vegeta smirked, and when he caught himself in the mirror across the room, it widened into a grin. _Not bad for a woman. She should smirk more often. Looks sexy. _"That should be an easy one. So all I have to do is bitch and moan all the time?"

The heiress gasped in shock. "Oh yeah! Well, all _I _have to do is-um- act like a big fat jerk with big feet all the time!"

"Oh, please. Don't hurt my feelings anymore!" Vegeta chuckled sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Next thing, we should try and look up information of people switching souls, like in our situation. The more we know, the better chance we have of finding what the hell is going on."

"Aye, aye, Captain," Bulma grumbled, but smiled a half-smile when he glared at her with two familiar blue eyes.

* * *

Uneasily, Vegeta wiggled down the steps, trying to balance on the obscene high heels and keep the skirt from riding up at the same time.

"Hi, Mommy!" Bulla called. "Aw, you're dress is real pretty!" She ran up the steps and tugged on the thin material. "Ooh. Is it silk?"

"Er. Yeah, I guess."

"Neat. Where'd ya get it?"

"At the store. Where else, the fucking moon?" Vegeta nudged her aside. "Can't you see I'm busy trying to get down these damn stairs in these ridiculous things?"

Bulla looked at her mother with curiosity, and hurt feelings. "B-But…Mommy…" she whimpered, pouting out her lower lip.

He sighed, with both relief at having made it down the steps, and because he hated it when his daughter gave him the pouty face. "Yes, Bulla."

"Don't you remember? You said we were goin' shopping today!"

The prince mentally cringed, and the brief thought of suicide snuck it's way up for a split second. "I did?"

"Yeah! We're gonna go to Tiffany's an' Old Navy an' that other place that starts with a 'p'," Bulla said, jumping down the steps.

"Penny's." _Why the hell do I know that? _"Well, um. Sweetheart. I have, um, important stuff to do. Can't it wait until-Fine. We'll go. Get in the car." _Damn pouty face!_

They walked out, Vegeta a bit clumsily, and Bulla with the happy, hoppiness of a seven year old girl. Grumbling to himself, he pulled out his keys and started to unlock it, when his youngest giggled. "What's so funny- wait, my skirt isn't up again, is it?"

"No. It's just that you're unlocking Daddy's car! I thought you said that this was his and that we should never go in cuz he'd hurt us if we ruined it?"

"I did? Er, I mean, yes, I did. And I was very right to say that because I-I mean your father-will hurt you if you ruin his baby-I mean, car." Vegeta turned to the other vehicle, the one Bulma used, and let out a groan of dismay.

It was a minivan, with a nice assortment of bumper stickers that proclaimed things like, "Proud to be a Soccer Mom!" and, "I support Women's Rights." And the worse part was that it was pink. He had once heard that only real men wore pink. But what do they call a man's soul in a woman's body sitting in a pink soccer-mom van?


	3. Living Their Lives

**Living their lives**

_If I get pinched on the bottom one more time, I will kill someone! _Vegeta sat at the table, and immediately put his aching feet on the second chair.

"What's wrong, Mommy? Do you have blisters?" Bulla asked, looking over her ice cream cone. "Want me to rub your feet?"

"No, I am fine." _I don't want me feet getting touched with sticky, dirty hands. There's a reason I like to wear gloves all the time, and it's because I hate dirt. _"Just a tad sore."

"Want some of my ice cream?"

"No."

"How come you didn't get any?"

"Because I don't like it." He kicked off the painful stilettos and leaned back in the chair, surveying the crowded scenery.

They were in the food court section of the mall, near a Dairy Queen. While he had bought his daughter some chocolate ice cream (on a cone with sprinkles. God help him if he forgot the damned sprinkles), he had his ass pinched for the sixth time that day. By the time he span around, the perpetrator was lost in the sea of people.

Unfortunately, Bulla had spotted a table and chair obviously made for the younger children. The chairs were in the shape of different animals, like monkeys and rabbits, and the table was multicolored, a rainbow of yellows, pinks, blues, and oranges. It was an absolute eye sore, and of course, the young girl would make them sit there. Using her pouty face of doom, of course.

"Isn't this pretty? I bet Daddy would hate it, though. He's _always _wearing either black or dark blue."

_Does she expect a man to wear pink? _He thought of his first day living here, when Bulma forced him to wear that shirt and yellow trousers. _I felt like a flower…_ "He likes wearing those colors."

Bulla shrugged, moving her eyes above who she believes is her mother, and then beaming a hundred mile wide smile. "Hey! Lookit, it's Uncle Goku!"

"What?" Vegeta turned around, and sure enough, there was Kakarott and his wife, Chichi. The tall Saiyan looked his average clownish self, and the woman looked like she was bitching about something as usual. _Oh Gods, no. Don't let me see- _

"UNCLE GOKU!! AUNT CHICHI!!" His daughter screamed at the top of her lungs, waving her ice cream in the air like a deranged monkey.

They smiled, waved, and walked over. The prince smacked his forehead with the palm of his hand, and thought of jumping up and making a hasty retreat. _Yeah right. Not with these sore feet. Damn shoes. Why would any woman want to wear such painful shoes? _

"Hi, Bulma. Hi, Bulla," Kakarott greeted them with a grin. "What're you guys up to? Shopping?"

"Yep! Wanna see the new dresses I bought?" Bulla asked, already pulling out the articles of clothing from the bags.

Vegeta turned to the younger Saiyan, blowing a strand of hair out of his face. "Kakarott, what are you doing here? I didn't know you shopped?"

"I don't. Not really. But Chichi is making me get a job. Has the interview set up and everything. I gotta get some new clo-" He paused for a split second. "Did you just call me Kakarott?"

_Shit. I did. That's right, they all call him that Earth name. _"I meant, Goku."

"Vegeta's rubbin' off on ya, huh?" Kakarott laughed, patting him too hard on the back.

"Goku, now's not the time to be dawdling. We need to get you a suit!" Chichi yanked on his arm in a futile attempt to drag him.

"Alright, alright. I'm goin'. See ya, guys. Tell Vegeta and Trunks I said hi!" And then they were gone, lost in the crowds.

Vegeta laid his head on the table, and groaned loudly. His feet hurt, his back hurt, the blasted hair kept falling in his face, and his eyesight was horrible. _I didn't know how horrible it was to be a woman-an Earth woman, at that._

* * *

The car was a new model, perhaps only a few years old. Kept in excellent shape, glossy red paint, smudge-free windows, freshly vacuumed, stainless upholstery the color of coal, and made of velvet. There wasn't a scratch on it, and if one ever touched it, the owner would find the person who did it and personally rip their spine out.

That was why Bulma was afraid to touch it. _I need a ride…but I don't want to risk it! Ugh! Such a pain! _She blew out a breath of anxiety, slid her hand under the handle, and opened it. The scent of apples lightly wafted out. _Of course he would use that scent. Weirdo. _"Okay, I just hafta scoot in, careful as can be and-"

"Hey, Dad!" Trunks yelled, causing his mother to smack her head off the ceiling of the car. "Whatcha doin'?"

"Ow!" She cried, rubbing the sore and jumping around, eyes tearing up. "Owie, that hurt really, _really _bad!"

"It was just a bump on the head. I've seen you take much more pain then _that_. Are you sure you're alright? You did seem off this morning."

"I-I'm fine," Bulma grumbled, trying her best to ignore the pain. _Stupid Saiyans and their indestructible ways. I forgot that they don't get as hurt as easily as us normal people do. Gotta watch out for that. _"Er, I was just showing you how not to act when hurt."

"Oh. Okay…wanna spar later today?" Trunks asked, bouncing a basketball in his hand, obviously planning on going to the park across the street, probably to play with Goten.

"Um. Sure." _Why did I just say that!? I don't know how to spar! _"I mean, you know. If I have the time."

"Cool! See ya later!" He ran off, of course not looking both ways before crossing the busy street.

"Bad boy! You didn't look both ways!" Bulma yelled, and he regarded her with a you're-acting-like-a-freak-today look.

Mumbling to herself, she slid into the car, felt for any bumps on her head, closed the door, and started the engine with the keys Vegeta had left for her. Shifting the gear into reverse, she backed up out of the driveway, and then, after switching back to forward, she drove down the street, towards the grocery store about a mile away. She knew that husband of hers wouldn't pick any of the groceries, so she would do it, even if it meant embarrassing herself (and Vegeta, of course)

When she turned on the CD player, the Eagles started playing, 'One of These Nights.' _What is it about him and his taste in old songs about sex? Next, I'm going to hear 'Stroke Me' by Judaist Priest. Gods, he can be a pervert, sometimes. _

She turned into the small parking lot, very cautious about avoiding cars, light poles, and other things. In the front, was a section, neither spaces to the sides filled. All by itself. She crossed her fingers and pulled in. "So far. So good," she said aloud, and hoped the guy who had stopped to look at her didn't think she was crazy.

"Nice car, man," the guy said as she slid out of it. "Sweet color. Is it a Corvette?"

"Er, yeah. I think. I don't know, this is my husband's car, he'd know."

His eyes widened momentarily, then he just backed away. "Uh, yeah. I have things to do…" He ran into his own car, a dark blue van, and sped away.

Realizing her mistake, she slapped her forehead, then yelped in pain. _I have to be careful in this body. He's much more stronger than me._ The spot where she had smacked throbbed, and she knew a bruise was on its way.


	4. Groceries

_Groceries_

"_Hey, Vegeta!" Goku called from the cereal aisle, waving a bag of Frost Flakes. "I thought you didn't do the grocery shopping?"_

"_Erm, yeah. I do." Bulma smiled uneasily. "So how are you, Go-I mean, Kakarett."_

"_Kakarett? I thought my name was Kakarott?"_

"_Uh, yeah. That's what I meant. I-er-hiccupped."_

"_It didn't sound like-"_

"_So, you didn't answer my question. How're you?"_

"_Doin' fine. I have no complaints. What about you?"_

"_Frustrated."_

"_You look it. There's a bruise on your forehead._

_She rubbed the sore bump. "First I hit it off the stupid car, then I smacked it with my own hand. Gods, I'm an idiot!" Wearily, she put a hand on her hip._

_Goku just nodded, confused half-smile on his lips, left eyebrow cocked. "Um. Are you and Bulma, like, changing places or something? You're acting like her, and she was acting like you. Called me Kakarott."_

"_No! Don't be an idiot! How could we trade places, I mean that's impossible!" She knew she was blabbing like that, but she had a habit of doing that when she was nervous. Geez, I sound like a moron! Why don't I just yell, 'hey, Vegeta and I switched bodies!' Still, at least I called him an idiot. Vegeta definitely does that a lot._

"Yeah…listen, I gotta go. Chichi is prolly at the check-out line, waiting for me. Spar later?"

"Er, sure." _Damn it, I did it again! Stop it, Bulma! You don't know how to fight! But then again, if I declined, he will definitely know something is going on…I'm in a fix!_

Goku grinned, eyes still dull with confusion, and left with a small wave. Bulma rubbed her aching head, and whimpered loudly. _I just wanna sleep!_

* * *

Vegeta parked the pink van into the garage, slid out the door, slammed it shut, and stomped to the empty space where his Corvette was. A growl was threatening to come out, and he didn't think he could subdue it. _If that woman crashes, even scratches…I just hope she knows the risks._

"Mommy? What are you doin', just standing there?" Bulla asked, walking out of the garage, carrying the bags of shopping items she had obtained.

"Just wondering where that wo-I mean, where Vegeta went with the car. Hope he doesn't fucking scratch it." He clenched his hands into tight balls, cutting his palms with the annoyingly long nails.

"How come you're swearin' so much today? You're startin' to sound more and more like Daddy, I swear!" She skipped away, up the pathway, onto the front porch, and into the house, singing, "Mary had a little lamb, little lamb. Mary had a little lamb, whose fleece was white as snow…"

Only about ten minutes later (which felt like an eternity to him), Bulma finally pulled in with the red car, still in prime condition. He nearly collapsed with relief. "I was worried you might have crashed my car," Vegeta growled through clenched teeth.

"Sorry! I had somewhere to go and you took _my _van."

"What was I supposed to do? Bulla was wondering why the hell I was about to take the Corvette, knowing full well, I would _never _let you drive, given the fact about your little accident last year."

"Give me a break. That TWO years ago, and it wasn't my fault. It was the truck's. You should've been more worried if I was alright."

Vegeta just rolled his eyes, and crossed his arms across his chest, noticing it wasn't as easy with the breasts in the way. The pressure actually caused a little discomfort. _How do women deal with this? _"I'm cutting your hair."

"WHAT?!" She screamed. "Absolutely not! You cut my hair, and I will take a hammer to your precious Corvette!"

"Calm down!" He hissed, looking over at the window, where the kids were watching them from inside, eyes shining with curiosity and amusement. _Annoying little snoops. _"Did you stop at the lab?" He turned his back to them, so they couldn't read their lips, and he talked in a low whisper. "To check on what may or may not be happening to us." _Why do I have the feeling she went to do something stupid, instead?_

"No, I had to go grocery shopping. Help me carry them into the house, please?"

"Why? You have the power of a Saiyan Prince at your finger tips. Do it yourself. I'm just a dainty little woman." Smirking, he turned his back and entered the house.

_Ugh. Such an annoying jerk! You'd think him being a woman and all, he'd be a little nicer! But noooo! God forbid! _Mumbling to herself, Bulma lifted the sacks of groceries from the back of the car, kicked the door shut (purposely leaving a smudge behind on the gleaming coat) and sauntered down the walk.

As annoyed as she was, she did notice a few things. First off, her strength, which had been that of a normal Earthling woman, perhaps a tad less, had definitely improved. She was carrying three heavy paper bags, and they felt like carrying pillows. Also, she noticed her eyesight was a thousand times better, she had never seen the world around her so clear before. _So. It seems I have his abilities. Interesting. _

Using her bottom, she nudged the door open and stepped inside, walking to the kitchen and setting the bags on the table. Vegeta was staring out the window, looking peeved off, as would any man in his situation.

"Boo hoo. Like sucks. Help me with the groceries…_woman_," Bulma added, grinning when he made a face at her. His _shut-the-hell-up _face.

"No."

"Don't talk back to me like that, Missy! Isn't the wifey supposed to do what hubbie says?" She asked, putting a hand on her hip.

"You never did."

"But you always brought that rule up, didn't you? Now you know how I felt when you said it. So HA! Take that, Mr. Snooty." She started to put away the goods into the cupboards and in the fridge.

Vegeta growled, but kept his composure. "Oh hell. I'll just ask. Why the hell did you think it was more important to stop for groceries instead of going to the goddamn lab?" He asked, rubbing his forehead, trying to ease the migraine pounding his skull like a jackhammer.

"Because we need food, and the lab is closed on Saturdays. Dad is Jewish, after all. Needs to go to Temple."

"I didn't know your father was Jewish. What are you, then?"

"Whatever religion believes in the freakish Gods called Kais." She handed him a can of beer. "Here, I got your favorite brand."

"You got this at the supermarket?"

"No, I stopped at the liquor store on the way here. So you could at least be a little mellowed down the rest of the night, and I wouldn't have to listen to your bitching."

The prince grinned, cracked open the can, and took a sip. "You know me too well."

As if on cue, the kids popped in, saw their mother drinking the beer, exchanged confused glances, then looked back up. "Mom, since when did you start drinking beer?"

"When your _father _starting driving me crazy." He walked out, still sipping, but Bulma could hear a little chuckle as she grunted angrily.


	5. Bedtime

**Bedtime**

**~Warning!~ Hey, a certain Mogul of Fanfiction came up with the idea, so blame her for the perviness. Sex scene alert! **

"The kids are tucked in, nice and warm." Vegeta stepped inside the bedroom, shutting the door silently behind them. "Why were they so insistent that you-me- put you to bed?"

"Because I'm-your-their mother, and they prefer it. Just instinct is all. Didn't you rather your mother over your father?" She pulled off her shirt, perversely watching herself in the mirror, noticing the finely toned muscles, and the many scars. _Damn, I am a hot man. _She giggled.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing."

He sighed, and sat down on the edge of the bed, looking down at the small fragile feet planted on the royal blue carpet. They were red, sore, and a large blister was on the back of each ankle. "I never knew my mother. I was adopted."

"Oh yeah. You told me that before." She sat beside him, and held his hand. There was such a big difference, the woman used to having the small hand, and man used to having the big one. And then it was reversed. "Poor Veggie."

"Yeah. Poor me. I have you for a wife."

She smacked him, incidentally too hard, and nearly made him fly into the wall. Instead, he landed in the laundry basket, dazed and out in la-la land.

_Oh shit! Stupid Saiyan strength! _"Vegeta! Are you alright?" Bulma ran over to him, held the head in one hand, supporting the torso with the other. The bright blue eyes were glazed over, out of focus. "Honey, speak to me!"

"Wa-waffles."

"What? You want some waffles?"

"Syrup."

"With syrup?"

His eyes did some sort of twitching thing, the mass of blue hair swayed as he shook his head, and then he snapped back into reality. For a few minutes, everything was silent, as they stared into each other's eyes (technically, into their own eyes). Then the prince spoke up. "You would make a good fighter with that technique."

Bulma laughed, liking the sound his voice made when it laughed- _wish the blasted man would do it more often_- and kissed him, without really thinking about it.

Strangely enough, he didn't feel the need to pull away, like he thought he would. Instead, he deepened the kiss, enfolding the thin, delicate arms around her neck. _Perhaps now that I am in a woman's body, I will have womanly urges. Disturbing…yet interesting. _

"I love you, Veggie," she whispered, as she slipped a hand up the dress. Bulma didn't know if she should feel freaked out right now, but she didn't. After all, it was _her _body. _It'll kinda be like masturbating, only I can't feel it. Wonder if he's seeing it like that._

"Hnh." Always the response, but she knew better. He wasn't an emotional person, even in a woman's body. Or maybe it was the hand fondling with the panties.

Kissing _her_ neck, _he_ fondled the place between the legs, before swiping the panties off entirely. _He_ slid a finger into the moist heat, as he licked a path down the soft throat, to the chest.

_She_ moaned in ecstasy, and nearly fainted then and there. However, _he_ kept _her_ composure, and managed to grope _her_ hands to the zipper of the black jeans. _She_ ran _her_ hands down _his_ already stiff manhood, and thought briefly of bringing to _her _mouth, when _she_ was shoved, quite violently, actually, back onto the bed. _Her_ skirt was forced up to _her_ thighs, and _he_ was grinning down at _her_. Demonic, sneaky. Like a little boy who had been caught stealing from the cookie jar.

Without another second, _he_ was inside _her_, each moaning and groaning in tune with the thrusts, _he _kept shouting _her _name, but was it the right one? _She _couldn't concentrate. _She_ didn't even know _her_ name.

_Her_ abdomen tightened suddenly, and _she _knew _she _was going to lose all control. With a near scream, _she _released. _He _was only a few strokes behind _her_. They collapsed together on the bed, a tangle of limbs, nothing but gasps of air being said. And they fell asleep.

**~A/N~ Yeah, it's a bit short. ^-^ But I figured it was a good way to end it like that. Anyways. The real reason I am making this A/N is because of the italicized lettering. It was to show that HE was feeling like a HER. Get it? If you don't, tell me in the review, and I'll further explain.**


	6. Realizations

**Realization**

The next morning, there was loud knocking at the front door. Vegeta, being a lighter sleeper than his wife, forced himself up, and pulled on a long white t-shirt. Normally, the shirt would've fit, simply because it was _his _shirt. But this wasn't a normal circumstance. Not by a long shot.

He staggered out of the bedroom, yawning, and walked down the steps. The living room was silent, the house not yet awake. It was eerie just as it was relaxing. With an annoyed grunt, he looked into the peep hole, and nearly groaned when he saw a familiar face. "What the hell do you want?" He growled at the younger Saiyan as he opened the door. "It's six in the damn morning." Not that he cared. He just didn't want to deal with him at the moment.

"Early to bed. Early to rise!" Kakarott let himself in the door, never one for manners, for he was raised without them. "Where's Vegeta? He said we'd train today. I know he always gets up early around this time."

_The woman better have not done what I think she did. _"Why the hell would she-I mean, he say that? And when?"

"At the grocery store! Is he in the Gravity Chamber?"

Vegeta rubbed his forehead. "He's not here." _Alright, that's a start. Now what? _"He decided to leave for awhile…" _Earth men do that, don't they? _

"Wait. You mean, he…left you?" Kakarott said, rather stupidly, and the prince resisted slapping him upside the head.

"No, I mean he's fucking right here, beside me." When the fellow Saiyan suddenly enfolded him in a hug, he was a bit confused. _He isn't making a move on me, is he? If he is, I will kill him. Not just because it's me, either. But because I look like Bulma. _

"I'm sorry, Bulma. It must really hurt to have him leave you like that, what with the two kids you have and everything."

He knocked him back, annoyed and confused. "What on God's green Earth are you talking about?"

Kakarott looked at him, cheeks already beginning to burn with pending embarrassment. "The…divorce?"

"We didn't divorce."

"So you meant that he…"

"Yes. I literally meant he left me."

They stood momentarily, in a silent awkward silence, the clown's cheeks still burning, a half smile on his goofy face. "Sorry," he finally spoke up, laughing as he scratched the back of his head in that old ritual he tended to have when stuck in one of his goofy moments.

"I'll tell him you stopped by, Kaka-Goku." He pointed out the doorway, but the tall man just put two fingers to his forehead and vanished into thin air. _Of course he couldn't leave like a normal being._

* * *

Bulma came into the kitchen to find Vegeta cooking up some eggs into a buttery fry pan. "You don't intend to eat that, do you?"

"No, I'm making it for the birds," he said sarcastically. He shoveled the food between two pieces of toast, also loaded with butter, and set the meal on a plate. "Why, do you want some?" He sat at the kitchen table, picking up the sandwich, grease and melted butter running down his fingers.

"Absolutely not! That is loaded with fats and cholesterol! You're going to make me fat! Do you know how hard I work to keep that figure?"

"I can work it off," he mumbled through a mouthful. "So calm the hell down."

"I will _not _calm the hell down! I don't want any muscles on my body! They're gross on a woman!"

"There's nothing wrong with it. It's proof that you are a dedicated worker and trainer. Why do you think I keep my body in such good shape?"

"Because you're a _guy_! It's that whole ego thing-"

"Are you saying all men have an ego problem?"

"You sure as hell do!"

"No I do not. I accept that some are stronger than me. Well, one."

Bulma groaned loudly in annoyance, but accepted the fact and sat down at the table to join him. "Whatever," he grumbled.

Vegeta smirked as he gulped down some orange juice. "By the way, Kakarott was here for me."

"You mean, me-you, or you-me?" She asked, snagging a tidbit from the prince's plate and popping it in her mouth.

"Uh, you-me. I think."

"So he was looking for me?"

"No, he was looking for me!"

The heiress tapped her fingers on the table impatiently. "I'm confused. Was he looking for Bulma or Vegeta?"

"Vegeta. The body you are currently in." He finished the sandwich with a loud belch, and tossed the plate in the sink. He glared at Bulma, who had stolen his orange juice and was now drinking it.

"Oh. Why?"

"Because you obviously did something stupid and told him that you guys can spar sometime." He rolled his eyes. "Do you ever think?"

"Shut up, Your Royal Pain in the ass. I was in a hurry, and didn't know what to say to him. I figured I could feign sickness or something."

"Yes, but I saw Trunks this morning as well. Said he couldn't _wait _train with Dad today." He glanced at Bulma, half-smiling at the reaction.

"Dammit. What am I gonna do now?!"

"You're on your own. I don't have that strength in this weak body-" smirked at the glare she gave him- "so there is nothing I can do. Try your best, and don't get killed."

"That's all the advice you have for me?" She put her hands on her waist angrily. _'Don't get killed' he says. What a nice husband I have! Not._

He stood up, and stretched his arms over his head, yawning. "No, I have one more piece of advice."

"And what would that be?"

"Learn to duck. It will come in handy."

"Gee. Thanks."

* * *

Bulma stood in the Gravity Chamber, amazed that the body was handling the extreme pressure so easily. _Is there nothing a Saiyan can't do? _Opposite of her, was Goku, looking like he was about to have the time of his life. _I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die!_

"Ready, Vegeta?"

"Hm? Oh, you mean me? Um. No. I-uh-have to stretch some more." She bent down and tried to touch her toes.

"But you already stretched! C'mon, I wanna fight!" He complained, folding his arms behind his head, standing impatiently.

"Alright. Fine. Let's go," she grumbled, standing straight. _I must have seen him go into stance so many times, but I can't remember what he looked like! Damn, if I wasn't too busy ogling him…_ She put out her fists, spread her feet across like a boxer, and waited for the worst.

Goku grinned, and went into his own stance, the desire to fight shining in his brown eyes. And he lunged, fists ready.

Giving a squeal, she held up an arm, and blocked the hit, sending waves of pain through her body. "Ow! Stop, stop! I can't do this!" Bulma shouted, ducking down as she wrapped her arms over her head. "I give up, you win!" _I guess strength and pain resistance are two different things. Who would've thought?_

"…You aren't Vegeta, are you?" Goku said with a grin, helping Bulma to her feet.

She looked up at him with wide eyes. "How'd you know-I mean, did you know this whole time?"

He scratched the back of his head, laughing. "Actually, no, but I was suspicious. The way you called me Goku, and you-who-isn't-you called me Kakarott. And the way you guys hold each other is very different."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean posture." He smiled. "Your posture, your chi, and just the way you walk. It all depends on who you are. Not even your twin can perfect it. Vegeta tends to hold himself like royalty, head held high, direct eye-contact, eyebrows furrowed in a knot, and stoic, so his emotions are undetectable.

"And, of course, his chi is another story. It used to be dark, somewhat sinister, though I could see through it. Now, it's a swirl of things, usually too bundled to fully understand. Mostly, I get slight fury, respect and love."

"And me?"

"You tend to show your emotions more, probably given the fact that you're a woman-" he grinned and shrugged at the glare she gave. "Anyways, you're eyes give you away. You can usually tell what you're thinking. Though you do hold your head high, you will sometimes lower it when you're upset, or tired, or are just feeling low. You're only human, you're allowed to have your moments. Also, you tend to put your hands on your hips when upset. Depending on how you are feeling, you will make eye contact here and there.

"Since you haven't really trained with chi, it is harder to detect yours. But I can pick it up a bit, since you're a pretty strong woman. Not like my Chichi, of course, but close. It works like your eyes, easy to read."

Bulma stared at Goku with a new kind of respect. _I guess I always kinda thought he was dumb. Probably for the reason that he never had any kind of education besides martial arts, and maybe because Vegeta is always going on about how he's a 'clown' and an 'idiot'. But I guess you don't need school to teach you things. _"Wow. So, if you didn't know by that, what gave me away?"

"Except for the fact that you ducked and covered like a four year old?" He laughed as she swung at him. "Simply for the fact that Vegeta would never back out of a fight."

"Yeah. Him and his ego."

"He doesn't do it for his ego, Bulma. Just because Yamcha is a dick and an over-inflated egomaniac, doesn't mean we all are. He just does it to be stronger. He wants to be able to protect you guys should anything happen. That's why I do it."

"But, I thought it was because-"

"Well, I guess you could say it's because I like to fight. That's true, as well. But I love my family more than fighting. And being strong is what keeps them safe from danger."

Bulma smiled. "Somebody is in a preachy mood today. Anyone ever tell you that you're a sap?"

"Yeah. Your husband." They laughed, but the heiress was really thinking about it. _Here I always thought Vegeta was fighting for himself. Can I believe that he's really doing this for us? Why are Saiyans so paranoid, as if danger comes all the time? Well, besides Freeza blowing up their planet. Guess I never thought he cared that much…_

* * *

He pulled the dress over his head, and yanked a pair of jogging pants and a white muscle shirt. _If she doesn't like me training, then it's too damn bad. She's going to at least work out a little. _He hated being so powerless in the woman's body, he felt naked and vulnerable. So he had driven himself to train this body while he was stuck in it.

Before he pulled on the trousers, he noticed a marking sticking out from the panties. He lowered them, and saw a tattoo of a cherry on his hip. _What the hell? When did she get this? And how did I not notice? _He attempted to shrug it off, and slipped on the clothing.

Outside, it was a light blue sky, with a warm sun shining brightly, only a few sparse white cotton candy clouds puffing around like smoke. He turned his head up to the warmth, sighed, and began his training routine, starting with a kata.

"What are you doing?" Trunks suddenly said, and he nearly jumped ten feet in the air. There the eight year old was standing, arms crossed, staring suspiciously.

"Dammit, boy, what did I tell you about creeping in on me while I'm training?"

"Sorry, Dad."

"Just don't do it again…shit."

"Yeah."

Vegeta nearly slapped himself in the forehead. _I walked right into that one. _"How long did you know?"

"Since the beginning, when Mom ran into me in your body. No matter what, she will always run like a sissy. That, and you haven't worked at all, but I saw Mom bustling around, like always."

"She's a workaholic."

"Nuh uh. She just wants us to have lots of money and food so we can be taken care of. Mom says that money don't live on trees, and that's why she gotta work."

"Money doesn't _grow _on trees, boy." _He has a point. She does work a hell of a lot. I always assumed it was something she enjoyed doing, but perhaps there is more to it. _

"Are you sure? I'm pretty sure she said they don't live on trees."

"Who are your teachers?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to slap some sense into them." He kneeled down and embraced the little boy. "Because your mother can't spar, how about we train?"

"In that sissy body?" He struggled away, obviously embarrassed at being hugged by his mother, even if it's just her body, and not her soul.

"Your mother is stronger than she seems, son."

* * *

The moment they saw each other in the bedroom, they ran and embraced together. "I'm sorry," they said together.

"Even I can admit I was wrong. You are indeed a hard worker, and do have just cause for it," Vegeta said, looking into his wife's shining eyes.

"I do it because I love you." She struggled to keep the tears at bay, but was failing miserably. _Damn my woman hormones!_ "And I'm sorry I called you a loafer. I know why you train. Because you want to protect us."

"Indeed." There was a momentarily silence as they held each other, staring into each other's eyes. Then, Vegeta leaned in, and kissed her, no longer seeing himself, but picturing his wife, his lover, and his soul-mate.

When Bulma returned the kiss, she didn't see herself, she saw her husband, her savior, and the love of her life.

The kiss was long, passionate, and relished. One ran his fingers through her hair, the other rubbed his back affectionately. And when they separated, Vegeta was looking into the bright blue eyes of his wife, and Bulma was looking into the ebony eyes of her husband. They were back in their bodies. "But…why?" Bulma whispered.

"Because we lived each other's lives, and found out it wasn't easy to each other. Learned why we did what we do everyday," Vegeta explained, embracing her closer, glad to be feeling the warmth of a woman once more.

"I see…I love you, Veggie." She expected him to just grunt, like he always did when that expression popped up.

He smiled an honest-to-goodness smile, kissed her cheek, and said, "I love you, too."

THE END!

**~A/N~ Don't ya just love happy endings? *tears up* This story was originally meant to be just a humorous one-shot bit, but it turned into this longer, romantic comedy thing, somehow. Things always get out of hand like this… I suck at one-shots, anyways. Well, I hoped you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it! And I loved your reviews, darlings! *kisses and hugs***


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